Great thread!! Here is what I wrote to someone in a PM a short time ago regarding this subject. If that person reads this now, thanks for hearing me out.
One of my first things at Bethel, at 19 years old, was seeing a bit of a double standard. At Patterson I got a lot of opportunities to see GB members. The one thing I questioned to myself was the way I saw them around female visitors. One in particular, Lyman Swingle, before he died, would put his arms around the sisters, point at his cheek, and ask for a kiss.
Now I'm big on equality, as I will probably point out later in my posts. So I don't care who you are or how old you are. If I would have tried at 19 to get that kind of attention from the ladies, and especially at Bethel, I would without a doubt have been spoken to about how my actions are inappropriate or perhaps at the severest point, been dismissed. Now I don't crave attention by any means, but to me that just wasn't right. And I witnessed it more than once. May not be a big thing but it definitely made an impression in my mind that I just can't forget.
I was also bothered by the way some were treated by others right in front of their overseers. I talked about it with a brother and he told me in so many words, that we are imperfect and we have to accept and forgive.
That I can agree with. Except the Bethel standard is pushed so much and praised so high above the "worldly" work standards and environments that I just couldn't be satisfied with that.
So again, a small thing, but made an impression in my young mind.
After all these years I finally just couldn't understand how the holy spirit works. That being based on things I have seen take place in the congregation more recently. And those coupled with my Bethel experience is what finally led me here.
CoC